Protecting Our Children

So What Can We Do to Protect Our Children from Pornography? Part I

By JoAnn Hibbert Hamilton

I don't think very many people really know if there has ever been pornography on their computer. The question is, "Has a babysitter pulled it up and perhaps shown it to your children? Has a friend of your children's gotten into it? To find out go to www.strengthenthefamily.net. At the bottom of the homepage click on Content Watch. On that homepage or under “Products” you will see Content Audit. It is free. Download it and according to those who put out this information, you will know right then everything that has ever been on your computer. You will know if you have a problem to deal with.

If you find pornography of some sort, talk calmly to the child. If you say to your child, "I have told you a hundred times that that stuff is filth," you will never know where your child is on this issue because he or she will never tell you. It is important that you stay calm and maintain a good relationship with your child so this becomes something you both can talk about. The only thing worse than finding it is to not find it because then your child will move into addiction.
Ask your children what they have seen. Most children will just tell you. Parents often don't know because they don't ask. If a child won't talk about it, there is usually a problem. If children do so easily, you will know right where they are.
A key is to teach your children that:

Pornography changes how people think.
Teach them that it makes deviant things seem normal. Explain to your children that's why their friends tell them that certain things are appropriate when they aren't. Their thinking has changed because of their exposure.
Teach them that the person involved is often looking for a higher high which is eventually nonexistent.
Teach them that it ruins relationships.
At some point, they will likely lose their capacity to love.
They often will not experience the real intimacy that God meant for them to have.
Teach them that it usually creates distance and anger in a marriage.
Teach them that it is quickly addictive, i.e. one exposure on the Internet, two weeks and common in three months.
Teach them that the criterion is to judge against innocence. If a baby who is born innocent never sees pornography until age 18 it creates shock. That isn't happening. How desensitized are our children?
Talk to your family about setting tighter guidelines of acceptance for movies, videos, television, or video games, then set standards where nothing inappropriate, vulgar, violent, pornographic or suggestive in any way is to be seen. There's nothing wrong with changing family rules when you learn about a problem.
Teach them to "crash and tell." "Crash" means that if they ever accidentally pull up pornography on the computer, to immediately turn off the computer. Then they will see just an instance of pornography instead of 10 minutes of it.
Teach them that they will feel guilt but it is important for them to tell so you can help them with this.
Teach them to talk to you about it. You want to help them and give them support.

To be continued